Everything fades
by DisturbingEmily
Summary: Magnus had always thought that death was the worst that could happen to Alec, but he was wrong, oh so wrong. R&R, Malec


**I'm not an English native speaker, and I don't own the Mortal Instruments and The Picture of Dorian Gray **

**And special thanks to Kiyori-chan for fixing my mistakes!**

**Also, I think that you should get the tissues ready, I cried when I was writing it.**

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><p>Magnus walked through the Institute's gate, deep in thought. He hadn't really realized that he was there, until Jace's loud voice broke the silence. He knew the way by heart now, and his legs traversed the route mechanically; never missing a step.<p>

"You're here again? Jesus, I've always known I was pretty, but coming here every day to gaze at me is a little too eager. You're pushing it Bane."

"I'm certainly here to admire your good looks, Blondie," he teased back, but smiled indulgently at the Shadowhunter. Even at the age of seventy, with wrinkles and nearly white hair, Jace was still his cocky, confident self. He quickly ditched him, and climbed steep stairs leading to the small room in the desolated part of the Institute.

When he carefully opened the door, he saw that Alec was still sleeping peacefully, his breathing regular and deep. He stealthily tip-toed to his bed, and sat on the wooden chair that he had spent countless hours on. He gently brushed away the silver strands that fell on his lover's forehead and sighed heavily, waiting for the baby blue orbs to open. For him Alec was still a beauty. Despite the lines around his mouth and eyes – it reminded him of happy times and how much the boy used to laugh when they were together. Despite his now sunken skin; despite his silver-white tresses; despite the fading of his extraordinary, sapphire orbs to delicate, dull blue ones. Despite all of this, he thought that the Shadowhunter was the most beautiful man in the world, because it was still his Alexander, his darling. And it didn't matter what he looked like, because to Magnus he would always be the most exquisite creature on the Earth.

Alec began to stir and Magnus painstakingly withdrew the palm that had been stroking his lover's hair. He held his breath, suppressing his gasp when those baby blues opened and focused on his face, anxiously waiting for Alec's reaction. Maybe today…

"Hello?" the former warrior croaked, his face confused and unsure. Magnus felt his chest tighten, disappointment and grief flooding his whole being. He shouldn't have gotten his hopes up; he very well knew that it wasn't Alec's fault that he didn't remember anything.

"Hi, I'll be taking care of you today, alright?" he smiled despite the splitting pain in his heart, and helped Alec to his feet.

"I'm Alec," the man introduced himself, while his upturned lips made the dimples in his cheeks show. Magnus felt something in him break again, but shook his hand anyway.

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><p>Alexander was feeling really well today, so he took him for the short walk to the Institute's garden. The man didn't talk much so Magnus chatted aimlessly and told him stories, and his old lover listened intently, drinking in his words greedily. He knew that he wouldn't remember it in a few hours, but still he couldn't bring himself to keep silent. If he did that, he would feel like he was ignoring Alec, giving up on him. And he swore that he wouldn't do that - ever, even if letting him go was the easiest way out. He secretly hoped that a word or sentence would spark something in the Shadowhunter and made him remember, and it sometimes did. But he was slowly losing any hope. It had been two months since Alec's last flashes, and every single day since was torture for the Warlock.<p>

After the Shadowhunter complained that he was getting cold, Magnus took him back to his room, where he started to read a book aloud for him. It had always seemed that Alec liked to listen to the warlock's deep, rich voice. He remembered that even at the beginning of their relationship, the warrior liked to sprawl on the fluffy carpet, his chin propped on his arms, eyes closed, and listen to him read, instead of doing it himself.

"_I knew that I had come face to face with someone whose mere personality was so fascinating that, if I allowed it to do so, it would absorb my whole nature, my whole soul, my very art itself."_ Today's choice was "The Picture of Dorian Gray", one of their all-time favourites. The smooth flow of the words was interrupted by Alec's quiet plea of his name.

"Magnus?"

"Yes, Alexander?"

"Why are you not wearing glitter?" the man asked, scrunching his brows, and looking dejected. Magnus felt his heart stop for a second, and then resume its beating with frenzied speed.

"Oh, baby… do… do you remember?" He felt his eyes fill with tears, and the book fell on the floor with loud thump, useless. His eyes didn't move from Alec's, not dull anymore, but alive with memories.

"I do… Come here." The man beckoned to him, smiling gently, and the Warlock jumped and embraced him. He hugged him tightly, his face nuzzling the crook of Alec's neck, inhaling the familiar scent, and he felt his lover's thin fingers running through his unspiked, raven-black strands. "Shh, sweetie, it's alright. Calm down. I'm here." The blue-eyed man soothed him, and Magnus suddenly discovered that these horrible jerky sounds resounding in the room, were his sobs. He felt Alec's shirt getting soaked with his endless, huge tears, but he couldn't stop them.

"I love you so much, baby, so, so much," he chanted, his finger's fisting convulsively in the material of the Shadowhunter's cloth.

"Magnus." Alec tipped his lover's chin, so that he could look into his greenish cat-eyes, and gently thumbed his cheeks, sweeping away wet tracks. He smiled serenely and pressed his lips to the Warlock's lovingly. "Sweetie, I love you too, you know that. Even if… if I sometimes don't remember it. But deep down I still do. And I'll never stop, alright?" He looked into Magnus' forever-young face, and searched for any signs of doubt . He gathered the boy into his bony arms, and the Warlock tried to believe that everything would be alright. That in a few minutes or in a few hours, if he got lucky, Alec wouldn't forget all about him.

His hopes were shattered though when the Shadowhunter suddenly tensed and pushed him away, his blue eyes wide and frightened. He weakly called for Jace, who applied a sleeping rune hastily, and the warlock stormed out, feeling even more broken inside than before.

He had always thought that Alec's death was the worst that could happen to him, but he was wrong, oh so horribly wrong. Because seeing him alive, breathing, still here, but not remembering Magnus and their love was the most excruciating torture that destiny could have prepared for him.

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><p><strong>Please review! I want to know what you think about it...<strong>


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